"The Mayor of Simpleton"

(written by Andy Partridge, performed by XTC, from their "Oranges and Lemons" album)

Never been near a university
Never took a paper or a learned degree
And some of your friends think that's stupid of me
But it's nothing that I care about.

Well I don't know how to tell the weight of the sun
And of mathematics well I want none
And I may be the Mayor of Simpleton
But I know one things and that's I love you.
When their logic grows cold and all thinking gets done
You'll be warm in the arms of the Mayor of Simpleton.

I can't have been there when brains were handed round
Or get past the cover of your books profound
And some of your friends think it's really unsound
That you're even seen talking to me.

Well I don't know how to write a big hit song
And all crossword puzzles well I just shun
And I may be the Mayor of Simpleton
But I know one thing and that's I love you.

I'm not proud of the fact that I never learned much
Just feel I should say
What you get is all real, I can't put on an act
It takes brains to do that anyway.

And I can't unravel riddles problems and puns
How the home computer has me on the run
And I may be the Mayor of Simpleton
But I know one thing and that's I love you

If depth of feeling is a currency
Then I'm the man who grew the money tree
Some of your friends are too brainy to see
That they're paupers and that's how they'll stay.

Well I don't know how many pounds make up a ton
Of all the Nobel prizes that I've never won
And I may be the Mayor of Simpleton
But I know one things and that's I love you.
When all logic grows cold and all thinking gets done
You'll be warm in the arms of the Mayor of Simpleton.
You'll be warm in the arms of the Mayor of Simpleton.
You'll be warm in the arms of the Mayor....


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Barbara Petersen, October 2004 barb@velvet.com